


What else would I do?

by iarrannme



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Karaoke, Road Trips, Trolling, troll!Natasha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:41:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22708645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iarrannme/pseuds/iarrannme
Summary: Maria, Natasha and Pepper on a road trip – a vignette in an AU started by Tielan.Or, as summarized by reader TheRedMenace:People think Pepper is everyone's impulse control. They are wrong.People think Maria has no personality. They are wrong.People think Nat is above being silly as hell. They are wrong.
Relationships: Maria Hill & Natasha Romanov, Maria Hill & Pepper Potts, Maria Hill & Pepper Potts & Natasha Romanov, Pepper Potts & Natasha Romanov
Comments: 6
Kudos: 41
Collections: Bizarre Stories and Unexpected Tangents, Focus on Female Characters, I Needed a Laugh Today, Secondary Character Focus, Women being awesome, Women of the MCU





	What else would I do?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tielan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tielan/gifts).
  * Inspired by [One Does Not Simply Walk Into Mordor](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14264424) by [tielan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tielan/pseuds/tielan). 



> Tielan wrote Maria, Natasha and Pepper on a road trip: Natasha is in a Mood, mad at Clint for unspecified reasons, and treating her symptoms with sugar. She didn’t get a chance to finish that work, so there was room left for plotbunnies …

“Why,” said Maria, already regretting it, “is there a plastic lawn flamingo in the back seat?”

“Pepper asked too,” Natasha said thoughtfully. “And I said you know, you’re right: marble’d be more dignified.”

Maria looked at Pepper.

“Don’t look at me,” said Pepper, “ _You_ were on keep-Nat-away-from-sugar duty.” She grinned, propping bare feet on the dashboard. “I do enough people-managing at home, I’m not managing Nat now. Also I wanna see where this goes.”

Maria looked at the lawn flamingo. She looked at Nat. She thought about arguing with an assassin In A Mood who’d had three chocolate doughnuts and a large espresso for breakfast. She thought about whether world security depended upon her winning, or even having, such an argument.

She adjusted the mirrors and fastened her seatbelt. “Don’t be silly,” she told Nat. “Everyone knows _marble_ lawn flamingos aren’t allowed in karaoke bars.”

* * *

After that, she couldn’t object when Nat found a karaoke bar that night and insisted they had to bring Captain America in. (Nat refused to explain the flamingo’s name beyond “If we call it Clint I have to stab it and it doesn’t deserve that, it’s just being the best lawn flamingo it can even when it gets yanked out of the world it knew.”) She did protest when Nat told the DJ they were a barbershop quartet, and even more when Nat assigned the main part to the flamingo.

She realized Nat might have won whatever game they were playing when she found herself arguing vociferously afterwards that if the flamingo didn’t shape up and start singing, it couldn’t come to karaoke anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from Billy Joel’s [“The Longest Time,”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_XgQhMPeEQ) which is also the karaoke song.
> 
> Maria is never going to discuss the part of the argument that involved her sticking her finger in the flamingo’s face and growling, “You had _one job_ , Cap!”
> 
> My niece was given a plastic lawn flamingo she had dearly coveted. She named it Captain America. Do not ask. I do not know.
> 
> EDIT 2020/05/09 - Got a subscription specific to this work today so it looks like it's time for the periodic note: I'm delighted people enjoyed the work! But this one's done, there's nothing more coming, so subscribing to it won't help you. Click on my name and then subscribe from my author page, that will get you notified of anything else I post. Have a good day and hope to see you in the comments! :)


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